Lately I've been feeling the (mostly self-imposed) judgement that I'm not doing enough as a mom to "raise" my children. Yes, I feed and dress them (or give them clothes so they can dress themselves). I change diapers and give snuggles. I drive them to and from pre-school, read them stories and listen to an endless stream of conversation.
But where I've felt that I'm lacking is doing stuff with them. Especially since Split Pea's arrival, I've become completely unmotivated about interacting with them on an "extra-curricular" level. And I feel horrible about it. So instead of feeling sorry for myself, I chose to do something to fix it.
One night after Thanksgiving, I came up with a plan that every day for the month of December, I'd do an activity with the boys. Sometimes it could be with family, sometimes both hubby and myself, but something. Something to reflect on at the end of each day and something that could remind me that I am a good mom to my boys. Plus, I figure that it will help save my sanity since the older boys have winter break for 2 1/2 weeks at the end of the month.
In addition to the daily activities, I wanted to also commit us to an activity outside at least once a week. Interestingly, the temps have been unseasonably warm around here, but I really do hope that building snowmen and making snow angels is one of our activities this month.
My hope is that at the end of the month, I feel a renewed sense of self-worth as a mom, and have kids that are inspired by the flurry of activities. And hopefully I also feel motivated to continue the activities into the New Year (2011?!? Wow. SO not ready for that).